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Writer's pictureDr Bakshi

Self Love – A Guide To Self-Discovery






In positive psychology, with the emphasis on modern love and the portrayal of positivity over social media, we have adapted ourselves to the importance and need for self-love, self-acceptance, self-discovery, etc.


Just as water, fire, air, and other elements of life are necessary and inevitable part of our survival similarly discovery, love, care, acceptance, and understanding for our self is also crucial in today’s times where competition, complexities, self-doubt, reassurances, inferiority complexes, and many such things take a toil for.


Many people view the pursuit of self-love as fruitless or even egotistical. The idea of loving oneself may sound hollow considering influencers' repeated calls for you to do so without any support. However, a ton of research suggests that loving yourself might improve your mental health, sense of self, and level of life happiness.



What Is Self - Love


The act of valuing one's happiness and well-being is referred to as self-love. A self-love is a form of acceptance that can be characterized as a deep-seated sense of compassion for oneself as well as an unwavering sense of support and care.

It might also be seen as a readiness to attend to one's needs, permit non-judgmental thinking, and see oneself as fundamentally deserving of worth, goodness, value, and happiness.


What Makes Self-Love So Important?


Self-love is not just a word it is a whole blend of emotions that drives an individual to greater possibilities and variabilities in life. It offers compassion, positivity, growth, and optimism in living life as an opportunity rather than as a threat.


It takes more than putting on great clothes and plenty of pricey makeup to declare that you love yourself. The phrase "self-love" refers to a variety of loving behaviours we engage in both physically and emotionally toward ourselves. I know a lot of well-groomed folks who have no idea what it is to love oneself. Because when you love yourself, others don't have to cope with your unresolved issues, loving oneself is not an act of selfishness; rather, it is an act of generosity for others.




Self–love Revolves Around Four Aspects.


1. Self-awareness


the word ‘awareness’ means being known or well versed with self or others. Self-awareness is an area of self-love which teaches how to discover oneself being in your best and worst altogether.


Being conscious of your mental processes is being aware of your thoughts, how they influence your emotions, and how your emotions lead to your actions. Are you conscious of the thoughts that irritate you and cause you to act rashly? What brought them there, and why are they there? Why do they influence your behaviour in this way? Self-awareness helps you to find answers to unresolved questions yourself.




2. Self-worth


As of right now and until the day of your death, you have it. We can only explore or conceal potential, just as we cannot generate or destroy energy. The beliefs we hold about ourselves determine our sense of self-worth, and we frequently find it difficult to do so. This is a result of prior unpleasant events that we have gone through and haven't entirely recovered from. All your positive traits make you valuable.




3. Self-esteem


Self-esteem is an ability of a self to have belief in their beliefs, goals, or ambitions which they set for themselves that needs to be achieved in their lives.

Self-love fuels self-esteem as it is a contributing agent towards developing, and discovering the self to a greater extent.


High self-esteem stems from a strong sense of one's value. While self-esteem is more closely linked to our abilities and accomplishments, self-worth is the understanding that we are valued regardless of what we have accomplished or the traits we may possess.




4. Self-care


Self-care includes all the things we do to maintain our health, such as taking a bath, eating a balanced meal, drinking plenty of water, and engaging in our favourite activities. Watching what you consume—such as the music you listen to, the movies you watch, and the company you keep—can also be considered self-care. Self-care is simpler to practice than the other facets of self-love. On your quest to learn self-love, it is best to start here.




How To Practice Self-Love?







To Practice Self-Love, You Must First Accept The Fact That You Are Not Perfect.



1. Get rid of negative thoughts, beliefs, judgments, and biases that you hold for yourself instead push yourself with more positive thoughts, optimistic beliefs, and other crucial and developing areas of your life.




2. Self–love also means taking good care of your body, being healthy and fit is what matters apart from being mentally good. The mind and body though are different, but both go hand in hand they both need the appropriate care and nurturance with time. Having some exercise and indulging yourself in certain physical activities will help you to boost your energy drive and maintain motivation throughout.




3. Write what makes you feel ‘You’ - Writing love letters to oneself that highlight their best qualities as part of this activity encourages self-love. The first stage is to list the top eight attributes about oneself that they find most endearing. The reader then enumerates eight instances in which these qualities have helped them in their daily lives. The last phase is for readers to list other methods to respect the traits. This activity is a kind approach for people to practice loving themselves and being kind to themselves, which will help them all their lives.




4. Stay focused - Acting out of necessity rather than a desire by keeping your attention on what you need, you can avoid automatic behaviour patterns that lead to mishaps, leave you mind in the past, and undermine your self-esteem. acting out of necessity rather than desire. By keeping your attention on what you need, you can avoid automatic behaviour patterns that lead to mishaps, leave you mired in the past, and undermine your self-esteem.




Therapies for Self-Love.





¨ You can analyse yourself by certain therapies or techniques which grow you.


¨ Like writing whatever you feel like.


¨ Engaging yourself in art, craft, or music


¨ Mindfulness or meditations do help a lot


¨ Trust building Exercise


¨ Living life with a purpose


¨ Make your life worth living by considering each day as an opportunity


¨ Living a life of passion and desire.


¨ Love yourself unconditionally


¨ Let go of all the shame, and blame and be your creative and best self in life.


¨ Be compassionate, reflect positivity and be considerate.


¨ Put a question mark on your negative thoughts.



Before you move ahead here's A Checklist for Self Analysis.







How often can you ask yourself, "What would someone who loves themselves do?" Whenever you must make a choice, no matter how small or significant, ask yourself this question. There will be one piece of advice and one caution for this practice.




When you decide to seek help, schedule an appointment with Dr. Bakshi.






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